Faith

It's important. There are upsides and downsides to every situation, and every situation is changing all the time. Faith is what allows a person to stand firm, believing in a particular outcome, despite the immediate demands of the present. If you believe in someone, you by extension have faith in them- you believe that person will ultimately win out over the situations they are presented with.

If you believe in a relationship, you put a certain amount of faith in that; you believe it will ultimately win out over the many challenges it is presented with. You cannot love without faith, you cannot be committed to anything or anyone without it. To live or to love without faith, is to render one's self an emotional mercenary, supporting whatever side happens to offer the most to you at that specific point in time. Switching partners or sides in a relationship has been thus coined as being unfaithful.

Faith is not granted, its a form of trust, and trust has to be built over time. If you break trust, if you break the faith or belief of another, it will never be restored in the same way. You can, in certain aspects, form a new kind of faith, a new Big Picture, and trust a person to be true to themselves. Without belief, without faith, love is just a word.

What is the difference between being faithless, and being unfaithful?

I suppose one is a state of being, and the other is an action. I think it is fair to say that one leads into the other. In most cases of infidelity, first the faith in the relationship is removed- the belief that a person can get what they think they need out of the current relationship is broken or dismantled, and then that person acts. Perhaps the action is neutral, perhaps it leads against the previous faith.

It certainly can't go in favor of the previous belief; once torn down, those old beliefs aren't really motivations anymore. Even if it it did go in favor, it would be dismissed as coincidence or habit. On a long enough time-line, with only neutrals and negatives, at some point a negative is going to occur. Unfaithfulness then moves out from being a possibility of a broken faith, and becomes an eventuality.

So what to do when someone is consistently and demonstrably faithless? Is it just a matter of time before they head to the other side? Should one just accept the inevitability and cut things off before the damage takes place?

As we've previously established, The Muse is definitely the jealous sort. She sort of expects to be cheated on, it's her history. She's easy to victimize, and its obviously been done before. No doubt her hyper-vigilance is the result of bad personal experiences. It's been a rough road, and one I generally don't mind traveling. I get questioned and harassed constantly, and god forbid I should ever mention anyone female in a positive light.

Did I mention I am slightly masochistic? Not yet? Seems a good a time as any. I enjoy a bit of pain and hardship in my life. I think it builds character. Also, I'm used to it. My life was so hard for so long, that eventually I grew to be comfortable with it. If things are going to smoothly, I seek out the rough bits and roll around for a while. I mention this because I don't want you to think that I am bothered when the Muse gives me the gears; the truth of it is I enjoy the concern and attention.

I am worried though, that it has been some time, and there seems to be no letting up on that front. She is as skeptical now as she is the day I met her, and just as quick to jump to these wild conclusions. Believe it or not, I am very much a Good Boy, despite the aura I tend to give, and one would think after being proven wrong again and again, she wouldn't fall off the deep end at every little thing.

I have done some shady things in my past, fair enough. But for years I've been beyond reproach. Now I am living beyond 'beyond reproach', and getting more crap than I did when I was behaving badly. Karma, I am truly your spanked up little bitch. This time through though, I've been nothing but Good, walking down the right path and doing good things. I don't deserve this kind of faithlessness.

Alright Karma, since you'll have it your way anyhow- maybe I do.